RANSVESTIA

have delighted a behavioral psychiatrist. I got rid of everything I had, and with all the conviction of righteousness, I strode down the matri- monial aisle ready to settle down to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Needless to say, things did not quite turn out as I had thought.

Far from being appeased, the girl within protested loudly at the sight of my bride in all her lovely things. During the first year, it did not unduly worry me. Rome was never built in a day, not even by Mussolini, and I was ready to give it time. Another year came and passed, and then, finally, the moment in my life when I began to learn about myself.

I suppose the turning point was the Christine Jorgensen incident, though strangely enough, I never paid attention to her at the time she was in the news. But it was in this connection that, through some chance remarks one day, I heard the word transvestite for the first time: I had to ask what exactly that was?

At the time, there was hardly any literature, no FP, no counselling. Still, it was an eye opener, and I began to read just about anything I could lay my hands on, for the most part of it medical and psychiatric literature. I soon began to dress again.

Years later and much wiser, I did make some effort to get through to my wife. To this day, I do not know if or how I succeeded. I don't know if in so many words she said, "it's your problem, I want no part of it"; or if she meant, "that's crazy, forget it". Or, perhaps it meant nothing to her at all. Whatever, it was it seemed a stone wall. I backed off fast.

3. EPILOGUE.

Dressing only furtively while raising a family, it has occurred to me how a feminine orientation will manifest itself in numerous and some- times surprising ways. Being and dressing are of course the essen- tials, but there is more.

Thinking back on the subject of friendship, it struck me not long ago as something of a surprise that I never had male friends. I meet them by the hundreds, colleagues, associates, professionals, acquain- tances, neighbors, relatives, enemies, friends, citizens, countrymen.

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